Sometimes it’s hard to keep track of how many raptures you’ve survived, but not any longer! This rapture punch card comes with an exclusive state-of-the-art tabulation system to ensure that you’ll never get left behind in keeping track of your rapture survival math!
This card also comes with a handy-dandy post-rapture agreement that can be entered into between a believer and a non-believer to ensure safekeeping of the believer's pets, belongings, and so much more! 
This (allegedly, albeit questionably) legal contract will protect the raptured Christian as well because it will make sure that your kids you kicked out of the house will be taken in by a loving family and, most importantly, your Grindr account will be deleted by the atheist or non-believer of your choice!
Don’t wait, supplies will not last, and though we don’t know the day or the hour, the next reptile will be here sooner than you’d think!
So act now, and get peace of mind.